


It's Not About the Dog

by Willbakefordean



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bottom Castiel, Castiel Feels, Castiel/Dean Winchester Feels, Detective Dean Winchester, Dogs, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Everybody Lives, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, M/M, Oral Sex, Surrogacy, Top Dean, Writer Castiel
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-15
Updated: 2015-04-04
Packaged: 2018-03-17 20:58:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3543566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Willbakefordean/pseuds/Willbakefordean
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Cas Winchester live a very happy life in small town New England. Dean is a homicide detective and Cas writes homicide novels. They are perfectly satisfied with their choice of no big cities, no pets or kids until a little furry friend crosses their path. This is their journey down a road they thought they would never choose.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Sometimes Love Finds You!

Castiel stretched his arms over his head, fists clenched, and legs splayed out; ridding himself of the stiffness he had accumulated during the last five thousand or so words. He really had to get back to yoga he thought as he unconsciously clicked the save icon with his mouse.  He glanced around his home office tidying the piles of resources that covered the top of the desk yet remained within arm’s reach for writing. It may have looked somewhat messy to the untrained eye, but it was organized chaos and a necessity for his process.  The work on the desk and the computer were also off limits even to Dean, which he had quickly learned once after a cold night on the sofa when he had “helped Castiel straighten his desk up.”

Castiel Winchester was a writer.  He wrote novels and his last three had been homicide novels that made it on to the best sellers list.  His previous writing as Castiel Novak was good as well, but he fondly referred to those as his pre-Dean work.  He never anticipated meeting one man who would so powerfully impact his writing and more importantly his life. 

 His office was a haven, full of memories already in the few years he and his husband had lived and worked here.  A large antique cherry finished desk where he currently sat, dominated the space.  One wall of the office was all shelves, containing books and other documents that he used as resources for work.  The shelves also contained various awards and photos of his life as a writer, and his life with Dean.  His favorite memento was a casual snapshot of the two of them on their honeymoon in Paris.  Cliché he thought, especially for the two of them, who were not the typical romantic couple, but what a hell of a week it had been.  Well worth the ribbing from Dean’s brother Sam, who could never quite let it go.

Castiel glanced into the bottom of the empty tea mug sitting on his desk and chuckled at the thought of his favorite memory of this office.  Castiel took Dean’s name when they married but continued to write under his own last name, Novak.  When they had been in the house but a few months, Castiel secretly changed his writing name to Castiel Winchester.  He knew Dean understood why he kept his own name for writing, but he also knew it had stung a little bit.  He called Dean into his office and presented him with his latest novel.  Castiel usually wrapped them like a present as a surprise for Dean. Dean was kind of expecting the perfunctory “gift” and was always proud of Castiel, just as Castiel was proud of Dean when he closed a case. 

This opening was different.  Dean ripped off the paper and looked at the cover, face agape as he saw Castiel Winchester in large type on the cover. He ran his finger over the name lovingly and his eyes shined with the knowledge and appreciation for what his husband had done.  He kissed Castiel wrapping his arms around him and conveying a sweet thank you through the contact.  When he pulled away, Castiel saw that sweet thank you change to a fiery need.  The desk that was so protected and organized was suddenly swiped free of papers, mouse and wireless keyboard freeing the top for a thank you that Castiel would not soon forget and there was definitely no chastising as he gladly reorganized the confetti of papers the next morning.  

 

The thirty-five year old writer headed to the kitchen to make another mug of tea.  He had to pass through the living area of the house. For a large space, it was cozy and warm.  There was a large fireplace with built in bookcases on either side.  One held a plethora of hard and soft cover books all well worn with reading, the other had clearly been customized to hold a rather large flat screen TV and a massive collection of DVDs.    There was a large coffee colored sectional sofa that had a recliner piece at one end and a beautifully made dark wood coffee table sat directly in front of it.  The placement of the furniture allowed for space in front of the fireplace hearth for a few large throw pillows to set back against the table.  The windows were placed so that during daylight hours, the room was bright and welcoming.

He stopped and looked at the snowy scene outside one of the large picture windows of the Victorian house he shared with his husband in a small New England town and felt a warmth rise within his chest.  It was a breathtaking view full of rolling hills and distant trees and the reason they fell for the house in the first place.  Castiel loved it here, what they shared together and he was grateful to whatever being was in charge of the universe or maybe to fate herself for bringing the two of them together.

Castiel Novak had, years ago, mentally prepared himself for the life of a lonely writer. He was moderately successful which was good enough for him to stay with the career path he had chosen to pursue when he was just a teen.  Four years at college,  followed by a year getting his master’s in Education at Stanford, a few commercially successful pieces and  he was well on his way to becoming at least financially stable enough that he didn’t have to have a second job at Staples or anything of that nature.

******

Castiel had finished his finished with his Master’s degree and had decided to remain in California, mostly because he had nowhere or for that matter no one to move back to.  He was beginning research on his next novel, a first try at a homicide storyline when he engaged the help of the local Police Department.  As fate would have it, there was a newly named homicide detective assigned to this public relations task.  From the sound of the ranting by the officers behind the closed door, he could tell he was not a welcome assignment.  He rose from his bench seat outside the chief’s office readying to offer his hand to help smooth over the clearly awkward situation.  At that precise moment the office door opened in a shit storm of pointing fingers and angry words.

 “And the only reason you are shackling me to this _writing asshole_ is because I am the new guy! And it sucks so quit laughin’ and shut the f-”  blasted a tall, broad shouldered man as he spun around and mid curse knocked the “writing asshole” directly on  his ass in front of the entire homicide office. 

“Shit! Shit! Shit! I’m Sorry!” the flustered man sputtered as he helped a stunned Castiel up off the floor, much to the delight of the room full of hysterically laughing officers.

 It was as Castiel’s briefcase was vehemently being shoved back into his hand that the two men locked eyes.  It was only a moment but it was long enough for Castiel to get a glimpse of the greenest eyes he had ever seen.  Castiel could feel the heat in his face as he was being hastily ushered away by the man who held his elbow almost too tightly, his own face a deep crimson,  right out the front door and into a beautiful, shiny black car.

 “Come on, man. Let’s get out of here before this gets any worse.”

******

Dean Winchester, Lead Homicide Detective and come to think of it the only homicide detective in the small town, was currently wiping barbeque sauce off of his favorite tie.  It was a gift from his husband who claimed it was the exact color green of Dean’s eyes. 

“Charlie, if this shit doesn’t come out, Cas is gonna kill me. He loves this tie. And if he doesn’t kill me, it’ll be a cold fuckin’ night on the couch.” Dean’s fellow officer Charlie and he were grabbing a quick lunch at the local bistro and she loosened the tie from around his neck and ordered club soda to try to remove the stain.

“Wow, Winchester!  Wife got you buy the shorthairs over the laundry? Maybe he shouldn’t pick out such nice clothes for you since you’re such a slob.” Charlie dabbed at the stain, leaving Dean smirking at the thought of either Cas or Dean being very “wife like”. They were fairly big guys, both just over six feet tall and decently built, who happened to be perfect for each other, the same way Charlie, a slender but wiry red head, and her pretty and independent wife Dorothy were perfect for each other.

“Well Charlie, if that’s the case, who’s the husband, you or Dorothy?” With that Charlie threw the tie back at Dean.

Dean was relieved to see the spot gone. He really loved that tie, mostly because of the way Cas looked at him when he chose to wear it.  The thirty two year old had never thought he would end up with someone who looked at him like Cas did.  He had resigned himself to the life of an occasional one night stand, because those were getting old fast, and maybe the role of Uncle Dean if he younger brother ever married that great girl Jess he was dating.

******

Dean had moved to Stanford California to stay close to his little brother, Sam who was going to school on a full scholarship.  Dean and Sam had grown up in Kansas, but had lost both parents to tragedy.  They had a couple of close family friends, but no other family to speak of.  Dean had basically raised Sam after they lost their mother when both boys were very young.  Dean’s dad had not fared well after the loss of his young wife and Dean just took over the role as Sam’s nurturer. 

Dean finished high school, got a BS from Kansas State University, and joined the local police force.  He quickly climbed his way up the ranks and became one of the youngest and best homicide detectives on the job.  When Sam got accepted to Law school at Stanford, Dean applied at the local police station and luckily for him they were in need of an entry level detective. 

It was his first week on the job and though his reputation had preceded him, in a good way this time, he was getting’ his balls busted left and right, as was customary in law enforcement.  He had been one of the top dogs in Kansas and here he felt like an intern getting coffee for everyone.  Dean got called into the Chief’s office for his first big assignment.

“Finally, they’re gonna quit fuckin’ with me and let me work.” Dean marched smugly passed his colleagues and into the Chief’s office raring to go. 

“What the ever-loving fuck are you talking about? Research?  What is that and why do I have to babysit some god damn writer who wants to know the inside of a homicide detectives mind?” Dean was so fucked. Not only did they saddle him with some shitty assignment for some author’s research, he distinctly got the impression that he was the only dumbass in the office who didn’t know it was happening. 

Dean ranted and argued until he saw the look of the Chief’s face and knew it was a done fucking deal.  He turned on his heels to make an emphatic exit and flung open the door as he spit out as his final words, “And the only reason you are shackling me to this _writing asshole_ is because I am the new guy! And it sucks so quit laughin’ and shut the f-”

At which time Dean promptly bashed into some guy in a rumpled trench coat with a brief case knocking him over and embarrassing the shit out of himself ‘cause he didn’t even know the jackass was right outside the door anyway.

“Shit! Shit! Shit! I’m Sorry!” Dean was pissed and frustrated, but it wasn’t this guys fault and so Dean grabbed his arm and shoved his brief case back into his hand.  The guy looked like a deer about to be hit as their eyes locked for the briefest of moments.  Never had Dean seen such blue and if it were not for the sea of colleagues chuckling and snickering, he might have stared into them a little longer.  But he could feel the redness creeping up his face matching the color of the other man’s and tightened his grip on the man’s arm ushering him out of the office and into his 1967 Chevy Impala. 

Dean apologized over coffee and Castiel Novak and Dean Winchester somehow fell in love during the weeks they spent together as the author gathered the necessary research for his crime novel.  The relationship took their lives to the next level, both personally and in their work.  Dean’s insights into the world of homicide shot Castiel right up the bestsellers list and the two fell into a domestic happiness that frankly, they had even stopped hoping for themselves.

They were together for two years before Dean asked Cas, as he called him, to marry him.   When Sam finished his degree, he was accepted into a graduate program at a University in New England.  It was just the move that Cas wanted, away from the big city, quiet and perfect for writing.  So here they were, in small town New England living the domestic life, Dean and Cas Winchester, rings still on fingers five years later. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...what do you think???


	2. Lost and Found?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Winchester go out to dinner rescuing happens...

It was Friday night and the close of a long week for both men.  Cas had met a major deadline on his novel for his publisher and Dean had finished a lengthy investigation which ended in the arrest of a couple of pretty nasty guys.  They had decided to celebrate by going to the bistro on Main in their little town.  Dean had trouble getting used to the idea of a bistro, because what the fuck is that anyway, but after his first gourmet burger there, he no longer gave a shit what they called it.  Dean drove them down to the lot by the Post Office at the end of the street so they could walk to dinner, relaxing and enjoying the evening.

The two of them strolled casually hand in hand. Dean, just a bit taller and sandy haired, brought Cas’ hand up to his mouth for a kiss, smiling fondly at his husband.  Cas leaned his head over to Dean’s shoulder brushing his dark, messy hair against the rough feel of his husband’s stubbly cheek.  Dean loved Cas’ constant bed head appearance and commented regularly to Cas about how soft his hair felt when is slipped through his fingers.  On one of their many trips to the pet store because Cas insisted he just liked looking,  Dean compared Cas’ hair to the soft bunny and just stared at his husband’s  dark head, rambling on about  the way his hand just disappeared into that softness. Cas drew the line before they both made an embarrassing scene in front of the other shoppers.  Dean nearly had his arm ripped out the socket as a wide eyed Cas cut the trip short and finished that discussion in a pile of discarded clothing on the living room floor.

It was only two weeks until Christmas and the main street looked like it had been painted right out of the 1950’s.  Wreaths on every lamp post and every shop window decorated to the fullest with quaint Christmas charm.  Dean and Cas made a conscious decision when they settled here to be loyal members of the community and they shopped in most of these little places on a regular basis, even choosing the mom and pop grocery over the bigger chains in the next town. 

Their lifestyle here was well accepted and they were really quite loved by the townspeople.  It was a reciprocal relationship with Cas and Dean being smitten with the town and its people as well.  Cas, famous author that he was, had even been honored with the lighting of the town Christmas tree this year.  It was quite touching even if he did say so himself. 

******

Ellen and Bobby Singer owned the little bistro on Main.  Their daughter Jo helped in the evenings and when she wasn’t working at Garth Fitzgerald’s Veterinary Clinic.  If you took a look at any of the Singers you would place them in a bar not a bistro, but they had some of the best food and the friendliest atmosphere Cas and Dean had ever experienced.  They frequented the place for those very reasons.  Friday night was seafood night and the two men were enjoying crab cakes and stuffed flounder, Bobby’s special of the night.  It was quiet and Ellen said it was because of the coming up holiday and everyone shopping in the bigger cities at the mall. So Ellen and Bobby even sat and had a beer with Cas and Dean during a particular lull in service.  They had been particularly welcoming to the Winchesters upon their arrival to the small town and had become very parental in their relationship to the couple.  Dean and Cas having no living parents appreciated that greatly.  

Dean and Cas loved to entertain in their house and had invited the Singers over for dinner a few times on Monday night’s when the bistro was closed.  They had discussed having a larger Christmas celebration this year with Sam and Jess of course, but maybe the Singers, Charlie and Dorothy, and a few other friends. 

We don’t know if you have family coming or if you have plans,” posed Dean, “but we wondered if you and Jo would like to have Christmas dinner with us this year.”

“It certainly wouldn’t be anything like you make here, “ stated Cas almost apologetically, “but we thought it would be fun to have a bigger celebration… with friends.”

Bobby looked at Ellen and then spoke for both of them, “Well I think that would be real nice, not havin’ to do all the cookin’ for a change. Bobby’s Midwestern accent always reminded Dean of his Dad when he was younger.  “We could bring a dish to share of course, “Ellen offered looking pleased by the invitation.

“Great,” said Cas, “I’ll call you next week when we plan the menu.” Then Cas and Dean ordered pie for dessert and Bobby and Ellen had to get back to work.

******

Dean and Cas stepped out of the restaurant and into the crisp cold evening and automatically laced their fingers together as they headed back to the end of the street where Dean had parked Baby.  Snow was falling lightly and made the little town look just like a Norman Rockwell painting.  They were chatting about the possibility of collecting slate for a low, hand built fence along the front of their house, like the ones Cas went crazy over when they took their weekend rides on the back roads between little towns.  They had just passed a portion of the street that bordered a little park backed by woods.   Dean heard the muffled noise first.  It was not quite a mewl, but not quite a bark. It was sort of a whiny grunt.

“Did you hear that sound, Cas?” Dean questioned Cas as his voice slipped into a detective tone.

Cas sighed at his husband “No, I didn’t. 

Cas was always telling Dean that he heard more silly noises in the house and in Baby’s engine, etc. He claimed it was because Dean had the ears of a typical homicide detective, paranoid and oversensitive.  Dean of course didn’t appreciate the commentary at all and claimed to be careful and concerned.  What he didn’t reiterate to Cas was that he had seen enough ugly in the world through homicide investigations that you bet your ass he was paranoid and oversensitive when it came to the safety of his family.

“There it is again, listen over by the edge of the woods,” Dean said, shushing Cas.

Cas was going to make a sarcastic comment but when Dean swept his arm in front of Cas scooping him back behind him while simultaneously reaching the other hand inside his overcoat, he knew he was reaching for his holster.  Cas perked up then and knew Dean had truly heard something.  Whatever it was couldn’t have been too bad or Dean would have sent Cas to the car, but nonetheless Dean was concerned.

Cas and Dean cautiously approached the one of the park benches and this time they both heard it.

“I heard it this time!”  Cas noted whispering by Dean’s ear. 

There was a rustling by some shrubbery and Dean straightened up and relaxed both his arms. Cas in turn relaxed but was not sure what Dean saw so he stayed a step behind him.

“It’s a little animal of some sort.”  Dean stated as he stepped forward.  “Sounds like it might be hurt or sick.” 

At hearing Dean’s words, Cas walked around him and over toward the bushes, but not too close.  Cas had a soft spot for things that needed to be cared for.  Dean knew this would kick in but wanted Cas to be careful, after all it wouldn’t be the best end to an evening if a rabid squirrel went into attack mode because a certain Dr. Doolittle got too close.

“Cas, now be careful there.”

“Dean! It’s a puppy!”

Out from under the bush it came, a timid but wiggly and very dirty little puppy.  As Cas got closer is slinked almost flat to the ground but its back end never stopped wagging.  Cas stooped to offer a fist, but was hesitant until the little thing rolled over in submission.  It was then that they saw the awful condition of the puppy.  It was very dirty and skinny with matted hair everywhere.  Cas scooped up the puppy who licked his face and turned to face Dean. 

Dean knew the look on his husband’s face well.  It was the face of a man skilled with words building his case against an opponent who was not so talented in the oral traditions.  Cas knew he needed to choose his words carefully here.  Something bubbled up inside him when that puppy who looked so lost and alone, just rolled over and trusted him to help.  He knew how Dean would feel about the situation, but he needed to alleviate this animal’s suffering and provide some comfort to the forlorn little pup.

They had a no big cities, no pets, no kids understanding in this marriage and they both knew it.  They had settled in this quaint little town as part of Cas’ no big cities deal breaker despite Dean’s career as a homicide detective and in exchange Cas had agreed to Dean’s no pets, no kids condition.  Besides, they were so in love they would have done anything or gone anywhere for each other.  They were perfect together.  Both men loved their jobs and fixing things in their newly purchased Victorian home.  They had each other, what else could they need?

It wasn’t that Dean didn’t love animals or kids or that he wasn’t good with them, on the contrary, kids and animals were like moths to light around Dean.   But he had practically raised his little brother his whole life and claimed he liked the spontaneity of he and Cas picking up and taking little trips whenever they felt like it.  Cas often thought that the real reason Dean had given those two stipulations was his father’s own poor example of parenting.  John Winchester had not coped well with his wife’s death and had basically left the rearing of young Sammy to Dean.  However, that didn’t stop John from criticizing everything that Dean did in his role as surrogate father to Sam.  By the time Cas had met him, Dean had little or no self worth when it came to how he had raised Sam, despite Sam’s kind nature, exceptional academic standing at Stanford on a full scholarship and his high praise and adoration for all Dean had done for him over the years. The brothers indeed shared a special relationship, though Dean never saw his value in its development. That always puzzled Cas, but also prepared him for what he needed to say to Dean next about this puppy.

“Now Dean, I have no intention of keeping this puppy as I am well aware of how you feel about these things,” Cas asserted firmly, eyes connecting with Dean’s, holding him rapt as he continued, “I also have no intention of leaving this poor bedraggled thing out here in this cold weather in its current condition.  I want to be very clear to you that I only intend to clean it up and care for it until I can take it to the town vet on Monday and try to find its owner. “

Dean had expected Cas to present a court room ready argument for keeping the puppy, just like a chapter out of one of his bestsellers with poking accusatory fingers and all.  But Cas, clever man that he was, confused Dean by denying wanting the dog at all.  In fact that sneaky shit presented the opposite argument, and damn if Dean couldn’t think of a single reason why Cas could not play good Samaritan/rescue hero to the pup.  He may have wanted to give a good reason, but he looked into those compelling blue eyes and just nodded. 

That is how the two of them ended back in the Impala, heat blasting, with a shivering ball of matted hair curled up in Cas’ lap.  Cas leaned over to Dean reaching one hand around the back of his neck and pulled Dean in for a very firm yet sweet kiss.  Dean’s eyes fluttered shut at the intensity and when they opened it was to two shiny blue pools of gratitude.

“That is just a down payment Dean. I owe you a little something else later”

“You bet your ass you do Dr. Doolittle.”

And with that, Dean drove home with Cas trying to guess what kind of dog they had found through all the dirt and matted hair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are welcome...


	3. You Had Me at Woof!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's bath time for the little furry friend...

By the time they got into the house, Cas had researched quite a bit of info on his phone.  He was guessing the puppy was a Yorkshire terrier and that she wasn’t really a puppy at all.  According to the internet, some yorkies known as tea cups, never get bigger than five pounds.   Cas thought that was about right for the dog they had found but that she was thinner than that do to her condition at the moment.  He had also read that they could feed her chicken until they could get to a store for dog food.  He thought that might help her gain a little wait until he could get her to the vet on Monday. 

Dean chopped up a leftover grilled chicken breast and they gave her a small amount in a dish so she wouldn’t over eat in her hungry state. They were both kind of horrified at how fast she choked the food down.  Dean made a snarky comment about entering her in hot dog eating contest and earned himself an immediate scowl from the other man.  Cas was afraid to feed her anymore right then so they moved on to cleaning her up a bit.

Cas sent Dean to the bathroom for the shampoo and a towel. He filled the kitchen sink with water as Dean came back with the supplies.  They had designed this kitchen themselves.  It had required removing walls and gutting old uncared for cabinetry.  That had been painful as they wanted to preserve as much of the original woodwork in the house as they could.  The refurbished kitchen had bright white cabinets with black marble countertops and all stainless appliances.  It was roomy with a large island containing the gas cook top and plenty of workspace. Dean loved to cook and Cas loved to bake, sealing the deal on a match made in heaven.  The sink was in front of a large window overlooking the back yard and gardens.  Tonight it was a glistening wonderland of sugary snow. 

“Seriously Cas,” Dean’s voice jolted Cas back to the present.” The kitchen sink? We have no idea what that dog has gotten into and you’re going to clean her where we prepare our food and wash our dishes?” Dean was protective of _his_ kitchen and wasn’t really sold on this whole dog idea to begin with.

Cas narrowed his eyes at the complaining and counters, “Ever heard of bleach, Dean? Or do you have a better idea?”

“How about the bathtub? We don’t eat in there.” Dean thought he had won this round.

“You’re quite right, we don’t eat there. However I do recall other… intimate activities that may or may not have taken place there,” Cas hummed, raking his eyes up and down Dean.  “How many square feet of porcelain do you want to have to scrub clean and I mean _really_ clean.” And Dean swallowed hard and thought Cas might have an argument there.

“Let’s go with the sink.” And Dean spent too much time thinking what could crawl up where if they used the tub and missed a spot with the bleach.

Cas settled the dog in the warm water and used their shampoo on it. The yorkie trembled and quaked a little but never showed any aggression and Dean snickered as Cas made reassuring comments as he bathed it. 

“Hey there little doggie, you’re alright. We’re just cleaning you up a little ‘cause you’re kinda dirty.  You are gonna feel so much better without this mud caked on you. “ In between, he gave Dean little orders, things he couldn’t do with two hands on the dog. “Dean pull the drain, the sink’s full of muddy water. Turn on the faucet use the sprayer to start rinsing the shampoo out of its coat.”

“And now we have to sterilize the faucet.” Dean bitched.

Cas growled and nipped behind Deans ear as his husband reached around to rinse the dog, “At least we will have a clean place for that thank you I owe you later,” And Dean thought about Cas thanking him in the tub and shut up.

Finally Cas, with clean dog wrapped in towel, headed to the bathroom to finish the job.  He carefully combed the dog’s coat which they discovered was quite long and silvery despite her tan face. This made Cas lean even more in favor of the dog being a yorkie.  And before Dean could call germfest on the comb, Cas told him, “Don’t worry, I’ll throw the comb away when I’m done.” 

He made Dean look up info on blow-drying the dog because he didn’t want to hurt it, but Dean said it was safe and in a short while Cas emerged from the bathroom wide eyed with the dog held to his chest. 

“Look at it Dean. It’s so pretty. Do you think it’s a he or a she?” At which point Dean unceremoniously flipped the dog over and announced, “GIRL.”

“Dean! Give the poor thing some dignity,” Cas chastised and put the dog on his shoulder as he clucked to _her_ “Don’t worry about the mean old caveman.”

Dean took that as his cue to hit the sink with bleach while Cas took the dog to his office to do a little more research. While Dean was scrubbing, he smiled thinking about how gentle Cas was with the little dog and hoped he didn’t get too attached.  Dean figured if this was a yorkie, they were pricey and someone was probably looking for her as we speak. 

Cas emerged with the dog as Dean finished the sink and damn if Cas didn’t have a fucking doggie ponytail on top of her head.  Dean was about to start breaking Cas’ balls over it when his husband looked up at him.  There was something in Cas’ eyes that just wouldn’t let Dean do it. He looked at Dean and those sweet blue eyes just shined as he glanced between Dean and the dog.  And Dean knew Cas was falling hard.

It was a little after 9:30 and they flopped onto the couch together, Cas spouting of yorkie this and yorkie that so Dean hit the radio on with the remote instead of the TV. 

“We should pick a temporary name for her until Monday.” Cas said, because he couldn’t imagine just calling her dog until then. 

“Careful ‘bout getting’ too attached now Cas.” Dean warned, though he was pretty sure Cas’ goose was cooked in that department anyway.

“I know, I know, I said temporary, didn’t I?”Cas sputtered in his own defense.  Dean watched Cas smooth the dogs coat and she was kinda cute all cleaned up, and what was the harm in a temporary name if it made Cas happy.   Dean secretly thought a happy Cas is a sexy Cas and he still had a thank you in a clean bathtub coming his way.

They started thinking of names and Cas rattled off a few. “How about Maxie?”  Dean answered, “Pad, ” And then added, “What? I went to high school.” And Cas wondered sometimes if he ever left. 

Cas continued but none stuck and they were both sitting on the couch heads leaning together when Eric Clapton came on the radio and sang _“Layla, darlin’ won’t you ease my worried mind”_

The two men looked at each other and didn’t even need to say a thing.  Cas simply said, “Well Layla, I am about ready for bed. How about you?” And Dean thought Cas could make good on his thank you now. 

*****

Cas put Layla down and opened the back door.  He followed her out and commanded, “Go potty.” Dean heard Cas and rolled his eyes and moaned, “ _Jesus. Potty?? Seriously??”_

“Better than the alternative,” Cas stated smugly as Layla did her business and marched right back in and past Dean.

Dean wiped his hand down over his face and headed up to bed.  The master bedroom was one of Dean’s favorite rooms in the house.  There was a king-size bed on the far wall and reading area with a loveseat in front of a gas burning fireplace, because who wants to haul ashes downstairs. There were built in shelves on either side of the bed that matched the ones in the living room, and across the room were two doors. One led to a walk in closet, the other to the master bathroom.  Between the two doors was a large photo of the couple on their wedding day. It was black and white and was taken from behind them sometime during the reception. They were leaning their heads together and simply holding hands. It was their favorite picture of the entire day. The room was painted a deep shade of blue that Dean had chosen himself because it reminded him of Cas’ eyes and the bedding was a combination of that same blue and a soft grey.  This was the couple’s oasis, especially since Cas worked in his office on the main level of the house.  Here, they felt like they were away from the world, just the two of them. 

Cas came into the bedroom with the frisky dog following behind him and made a little bed with a towel on the floor in front of the trunk that held extra linens at the foot of the bed.  Dean had stripped to his boxers and t-shirt and stood staring as Cas.

“Maybe the bathroom tonight in case she takes a piss or something, huh,” Dean asked.

“She’ll be fine here. She went out,” Cas answered.

“Not on the damn bed,” Dean insisted, because we don’t even know if the mutt has fleas he thought.

Cas snorted, “Like she could get up there even if she wanted to.” Cas left Layla on her little bed and changed into pajama pants as Dean emerged from the bathroom having brushed his teeth.  He kissed Dean as they passed each other and Dean couldn’t resist petting the dog good night, she looked so happy to have a warm bed.

“Go to sleep, Layla,” Dean instructed the dog and scratched her giant ears.  He contemplated the situation and added, “And don’t piss anywhere.”Dean knew bringing the dog home was the right thing to do, but he also suspected how attached Cas would get.  Cas and he visited the town’s pet store quite frequently despite having no need.  He knew he was going to end up the bad guy here, but come Monday morning, this little invader was going.

Dean and Cas pulled back the covers and climbed in the bed scooting instinctively to the middle to find each other.  Cas turned on his side to face Dean and put his hand over Dean’s heart and laid his head on Dean’s shoulder. Softly he whispered, “Thank you.”

Dean turned to face Cas and answered, “Couldn’t have just left her there.”

Cas leaned up on his elbow, “Dean, not just that… for getting me.  You always do, you know.”

“I believe I owe you a thank you,” Cas breathed into Dean’s ear and then leaned in lining Dean’s neck with soft, wet kisses.

Dean pulled Cas over on top of him and rumbled back, “And I intend to collect.” Cas slid a knee between Dean’s and kissed him softly on the mouth. Dean hummed at Cas’s kiss and opened, inviting Cas in, kissing him back fervently. Dean slid his hands down Cas’ back stroking his fingers  up Cas’sides and back down and rested his hands on the roundness of what he fondly referred to as  ” his husband’s fine ass”.  He thrust his hips upwards and Cas rolled his down, grinding their hardening cocks together. Dean moaned as Cas continued the friction and captured Dean’s mouth in filthy kisses.  Cas flipped them over so Dean was the one on top and Dean began to earnestly grind his hips into Cas’. He rucked Cas’ shirt up and zeroed in on one of Cas’ nipples, biting and sucking, drawing whimpers and moans out of his husband. He pulled the shirt up and off of Cas and then removed his own pressing their bodies together chest to groins, humming at the hot skin to skin feel.  He was shimmying Cas’ pants down and stroking his erection when something jumped on them from the top of the bed by their pillows.

“Jesus Christ Cas! That damn dog scared the shit out of me,” Dean yelled, though Dean was pretty sure the beginning of that statement was a shriek.

“Sorry, Sorry, don’t know how she got up here.” Cas apologized and tried to grab the dog, knowing how pissed Dean would be with the dog on the bed.

Layla, however had a different idea and had burrowed herself beneath the covers and come back up to snuggle right at Dean’s side.  Dean looked down and something in the way that dog had just made her way to his side hit him funny. It was like she had done it a million times before.

He grabbed Cas’ hands and said, “Stop… stop. Jesus, she knew just how to crawl into a bed!  Look at her, like she owns the place.  Dean couldn’t help but smile as he asked, “You didn’t see any fleas or other shit on her did you?” 

Cas answered, tone still apologetic, “No, nothing like that.” 

“Then just leave her, but only tonight,” Dean amended, and placed his hand on his husband’s cheek. “Remember only for the weekend, Cas. Someone’s probably looking for her.”

 Cas heard Dean comment, “She must have jumped up on the trunk then the bed,“ sounding  like he was proud of her accomplishment instead of pissed.  Dean threw Cas his shirt and pulled his own shirt back on.

The two men lay facing each other with that silly little ponytail spouting dog between them and for Cas, something just felt right about it.  “But you still owe me a thank you, dude.” Dean reminded him with a goodnight kiss.  And if Dean played with Layla for a while when he thought Cas was asleep, no one needed to know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love the puppy pony!!!! My Pepper Potts always has one... 
> 
> Comments are most welcome...


	4. Monday, Monday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cas enjoys Layla for the rest of the weekend, ignoring the impending doom of Monday lurking over his head. Secretly, maybe Dean enjoys it a little too...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have this thing for Russell Crowe as Robin Hood. I am not ashamed and I feel like Dean would too, so I passed it off on him as well...

Dean turned over and stretched reaching for Cas only to find the bed empty but the air full of the smell of bacon frying.  He jumped in the shower and got warmly dressed in comfortable jeans, t shirt, grey Henley and a black and white plaid flannel shirt.  He padded down the stairs in warm woolen socks and headed for the kitchen and the smell of that bacon. 

Cas was dressed just as warmly, and was stirring a pan of scrambled eggs when the timer for the oven went off.    He turned to the oven and pulled out a pan of biscuits steaming and golden brown.  Layla was lying flat on the floor out of Cas’ way and as Dean entered the kitchen, she jumped up to greet him.  Cas put the pan of biscuits on the rack he had placed on the counter and then placed a small bowl of cut up chicken on the floor next to the temporary water bowl.  Layla scarfed it down quickly and wagged her little cropped tail at both men as if looking for more. Cas answered her in a loving tone, ”That’s all for now Layla, don’t want a tummy ache.” Dean just rolled his eyes and kissed his husband before sitting at the kitchen table to eat.

Saturday was snow removal day at the Winchester home.  Their house had many angled roofs that needed to be cleared of snow buildup.  Dean and Cas had a well established routine of big breakfast and then outside work.  After several cups of coffee and cleaning up the dishes, the two men headed through the kitchen and mud room to the garage for the necessary tools.  Cas scraped the roof sections with a large paddle and Dean followed behind shoveling all of the snow out of pathways and off of the driveway.  He also cleared a path for the mailman.  It took a couple of hours every Saturday, before they got to do anything else for the day.  The whole time they worked, Layla wandered about never getting under their feet or in their way.  Dean commented on how she always seemed to know where not to be and Cas, well he just smiled and enjoyed her company.

When they had finished with the snow removal, Cas reminded Dean that they needed to head into town for a few things. “Some stuff we ordered for Christmas is in,” Cas stated and then quickly added, “I was thinking of dropping by the pet store with Layla.”

“Cas,“ Dean warned, “Can’t we can just make do ‘til Monday?”

“I just want to ask Pam a few questions and get her some food, that’s all,” insisted Cas.  Somehow, Dean knew it wouldn’t be that simple. He had been with Cas in that pet store when he wasn’t in possession of a live dog. He could hardly imagine what it would be like today, but he agreed to go and Cas could scarcely contain his exuberance. 

Dean took advantage of the short ride into town to reiterate to Cas that the dog was only under their care until Monday when they went to the vet with her.  He revisited some of the things they had observed about the dog’s demeanor such as how friendly she was, the fact that she was well house trained, was used to being in bed with people and the way she stuck around them when they were outside in the yard. Dean needed Cas to see all of these things as signs that she was truly someone’s lost dog and was probably currently missed by her owners.  Cas seemed a little annoyed by the talk but Dean was concerned that Cas was getting very comfortable with the little ponytailed bundle of energy sitting in his lap. Truth be told though Cas had the outward appearance of a lean muscled and rugged guy, with a serious approach to life, Dean knew what truly lay beneath that exterior was a gentle heart that could be broken.

“I’m just sayin’ be prepared for what’s coming,” Dean cautioned Cas as they parked at the Post office lot.

“I get what this is, _Dean_ ,” Cas retorted, “Couple of days of fun, that’s all this is. Let me have it?” Dean looked at Cas who was pleading with his eyes, those damn blue eyes and caved.

“s’long as you get the big picture babe,” Dean answered softly while taking Cas’ gloved hand in his as the two men proceeded to Pam’s Pets on the main street of town. 

*****

Pam Barnes owned her own pet shop and loved to see her “two favorite hotties” when they came by, though she never quite understood why they frequented her shop so often as they had no pets.  As they entered today to the friendly jingle of the bell above the door, she noticed they were a threesome. 

“Hey there boys,” she called out lasciviously from the register, “whatcha got there?” Pam came from around the counter to greet the two men and Layla.

“Morning, Pam,” exclaimed Cas eagerly, “this is Layla. We found her down by the park last night on our way back from dinner.” Feeling Dean’s eyes on him, Cas continued, “She was a mess, so we cleaned her up and fed her.  We are just helping her through the weekend until we can take her to the vet and find her owners on Monday.”

“She seems pretty friendly and tame, so we’re betting someone is already looking for her,” Dean offered, “Cas here just had a few questions about food and stuff, right babe?”

Pam looked from Cas to Layla to Dean as if to say, yah right, and aren’t you stupid ‘cause this blue eyed guy is gone on this dog, you idiot. But Dean shot back a pleading gaze that must have hit home, because the next words Dean heard from Pam were, “Well Cas, fire away.”

Pam spent the next forty-five minutes with Cas affirming that Layla was indeed a Yorkie, but she thought maybe a tea cup yorkie due to her size.  They discussed a plan for feeding her so that she would gain a little weight and picked out a food for small breed dogs, which Dean noticed, was not cheap.  Dean sort of let Cas have his time with Pam and Layla and when they were ready to go, they had food, a black harness and leash(not pink, thank God) and a satisfied look on Cas’ face. They also left with the knowledge that Pam had not heard of anyone missing a yorkie in the area, though most people who lost pets posted notices on her store bulletin board.  The last thing Pam did with Cas before they left was adjust and fit the harness so Layla didn’t have to be carried anymore in town. 

“Thanks a million, Pam,” Cas gushed as Pam kissed him on the cheek, “enjoy the rest of your day. Say Thank you, Layla.”

“Thanks, Pam,” Dean said, eyes conveying more gratitude than the words.  As Pam leaned in to kiss his cheek, she whispered, “You’re in trouble there big guy, but I can see you already know that.”

Cas proceeded to put Layla down outside as the three of them finished the Saturday errands.  And if Dean heard the story of how they found her and were only taking care of her for the weekend once, he heard if a hundred times as everyone they passed was curious about the new Winchester on the black leash.

*****

The weekend proceeded as usual for the husbands, Sunday morning donuts at the local coffee shop with the addition of one very well behaved Layla.  Dean actually could not get over how well socialized Layla was and how she took to their routine. She never even had an accident in the house, though Cas and Dean had to dig a damn path in the snow in the backyard after Layla refused to wade through deep snow to pee.  After coffee they headed to the grocery store and Cas and Layla stayed in the car as Dean shopped for a few items they needed at the house.  Dean of course came out to find Cas talking with someone about the dog.  It was Jo and as they drove home, Cas told Dean that they should bring Layla in at eight o’clock and Dr. Fitzgerald would see them.  Jo was the vet’s assistant and she said she would call him and let him know to expect them first thing in the morning.

Dean made dinner mid afternoon and Layla lay by the fireplace or in Cas lap as he read his book.  Dean began to feel pangs of guilt as he looked at Cas who seemed so happy with Layla.  Not that Cas wasn’t happy with their life before Layla, but there was just a little change, something indefinable but present in Cas’ demeanor since Friday night. Dean thought he liked it, whatever it was. 

******

 

Monday morning came much too soon as far as Cas was concerned.  He delayed getting up as long as he could whispering to Layla so as not to wake up Dean just yet.  Dean had said Layla could only sleep with them one night, but Cas noticed that he never said a word when she joined them on Saturday and Sunday night as well.  He was dreading going to the vet and having to give Layla up.  She had been such a fun part of their weekend and really no trouble at all, even Dean seemed to enjoy her company. 

But Cas knew it would all come to an end.  He really had tried to prevent himself from thinking of her as his, and to prepare himself from the inevitable. He just never factored in how much he would enjoy caring for something that was so small and sweet, that depended on him.

Layla needed to go out and then Cas showered and dressed before waking Dean.  As Dean got ready, Cas popped some frozen waffles in the toaster. “We don’t want to be late, now do we Layla,” Cas said trying to convince himself more than the dog.  He couldn’t help thinking that maybe being late wouldn’t be so awful, if it meant a few more minutes with Layla.  He shook his head and poured the coffee as Dean popped down into the kitchen, dressed in dark slacks, a shirt and tie and wearing his holstered gun for work after the appointment.  He came around the island in the kitchen and placed his hand on the small of Cas’ back, as Cas leaned in and pressed their foreheads together. “Morning, sweetheart,” Cas greeted Dean as he kissed him.

“Mornin, hon.” Dean answered as he pulled out of the kiss, “And good morning to you Miss Layla,” Dean reached down to scratch the dogs ears.  He could not get over how big those triangle ears were.  They were comical really and he thought he might actually miss those funny ears.  He did not, however, voice that thought to Cas because he figured today would be hard enough for his husband as it was.  Dean  put the dishes in the dishwasher as Cas put the harness on Layla. Dean donned his long grey dress coat over his work clothes and Cas wore his faithful trench coat over his jeans and sweater and they were off to the vet.

******

Dr. Garth Fitzgerald was the town veterinarian.  Dean and Cas had met him in passing on several occasions in the time they had lived here but of course never had direct dealings with him at his veterinary clinic.  He preferred to be called Garth by his patient’s owners and was generally laid back in his demeanor.  He did, however have an excellent reputation as a vet and was well loved by all who knew him.  He was a tall, lanky man who could best be described as one of the town’s beloved characters. 

Dean and Cas pulled into the parking lot at Fitzgerald’s Veterinary Clinic and readied themselves to say goodbye to Layla.  Dean leaned over and kissed Cas before they got out of the car in silence.  Dean had no idea what to say to Cas whom he was sure had gotten far too attached to Layla.

They entered the clinic to find Garth and Jo waiting for them at the reception counter.  No one else was in the waiting room across from the counter.  “Good morning, Winchester family,” Garth greeted them fondly, “what brings you here today?” Dean was pretty sure it was obvious because he knew Jo had told him about Layla, but he held back and let Cas take the lead.

“Well, Dr. Fitzgerald-“ Cas began before he was interrupted politely by Garth.

 “Please, call me Garth, “ Garth offered warmly, “My apologies, continue.”

“Cas Winchester, Garth,” Cas began again, “and this is my husband Dean.  And this is Layla, a stray we found on Friday night.”  Cas continued to explain the weekend to Garth who listened quite intently with soft blue eyes glancing from Dean to Cas to Layla.  When Cas had finished his narration, Garth invited them into an exam room to continue the appointment.

He informed them that he thought Layla was indeed a full bred Yorkshire Terrier about two years old, spayed and from her general health that she had been lost for couple of weeks, not days.  Other than needing food, he did not think that she needed any other health care.  “Looks like she is in good hands, I would like to see her again in two weeks,” Garth directed upon completing the appointment.

“Wait, wait, wait,” stammered Dean, “this is not our dog; we are bringing her to you. You need to find her owners.”

“Now hold on there, Dean,” Garth voiced in his slow laid back way, “This is a vet clinic, not a shelter. We don’t take in stray animals unless they are hurt and need care.  And to be honest with you, no one has put out the word on a lost Yorkie in the area.”

“Pam at the pet store told us the same thing,” Cas offered quietly, “What do we do then?”

“Wait a minute,” Dean interjected, “Because no one is missing this dog that you are aware of, we can’t leave her with you?”

“Truthfully, “ Garth answered looking from Cas to Dean, “Full breed dog like that, missing a couple of weeks, based on lookin at her, should have been reported by now. Pam hasn’t heard, no signs anywhere in town. There is even a yorkie breeder a few hours from here who contacts me when a yorkie is reported lost to her and I haven’t heard a thing.  I’d say she needed a home.”

Cas reinserted himself in to the conversation anxiously, “What happens to her if we can’t keep her?”

Dean looked as Cas with sympathy as Garth answered, “I guess it’s up to you to find someone who can or drop her at a shelter. You both seem to like her though, took good care of her and she looks happy. Why don’t you just take her home with you?” And with that Garth took Layla’s file out to Jo.

******

The two men sat in the exam room of the clinic looking into each other’s stunned eyes.   They had expected to come here, drop of Layla and walk out empty handed, ripping off the proverbial band aid as quick and painless as possible.  Now, is seemed the band aid would be removed slowly, hair by hair.

“Damn, Cas. Wasn’t expecting that,” coughed out an astounded Dean.

“Well, I don’t want her to go to a shelter,” Cas spoke softly, “maybe I’ll call Pam and see if she can help us find a home, maybe even keep her at the store till then.”  “Yah, sounds good” Dean replied, ‘Let’s go.”

Cas paid the bill and thanked Jo for the help as Garth was In another room with a patient. “So,” Jo scrunched her face up happily, “good news, huh? No owner. Now you can keep her, right?”

Before Dean could say anything, Cas piped in “Oh no Jo, we don’t have pets.  We need to find her a good home.”  Cas adjusted Layla in his hold, grabbed the paperwork and headed to the car.  Dean just looked at Jo and followed Cas out to the car. 

The drive home was quiet. Both men spent the time contemplating the situation carefully. Cas looked despondently out the window of the Impala. He couldn’t even find it in himself to offer his hand in the middle of the seat to hold Dean’s like he usually did when they drove.  To his surprise, Dean did not drive home.  He drove to the post office lot and parked the car. 

“Why’d we stop here?” Cas asked head against the window half expecting he knew the answer.

Dean unbuckled his seat belt, reached over to Cas and took his hand, waiting for Cas to look at him.  When he didn’t respond to his squeeze, Dean took his other hand, placing it on Cas’ stubbly chin and pulled his face to look into his eyes.  Cas met his gaze but only for a second before looking down and sullenly stating, “Better to see if Pam will take her now, I guess.”

“Now wait a second,” Dean scolded, “Look at me, Cas.”

“I can’t, Dean. I’m hanging on here but barely. I-I let myself get too invested, “Cas’ said, voice cracking.

“Well we knew that was coming, didn’t we Layla?” Dean quipped petting the dog that had jumped over to Dean’s lap.

“Jesus, Dean thanks.” Cas shot back looking up to glare at Dean. But as Cas connected his look with Dean’s, he saw a glint in Dean’s eyes.  Cas was confused. Dean would not be unsympathetic in this situation.

Dean smirked at Cas as he leaned toward him and asked, “What do you want to do about this dog?”

“Dean,” Cas snipped, “What the hell?”

“Dean slid over into Cas’ seat, unbuckled his seat belt, slid one hand around his waist and the other hand into his hair. He pulled Cas in, breathing into his lips, “Tell me what you want to do about this dog,” and he kissed Cas sweetly but deeply.

Cas’ eyes closed as Dean kissed him and he melted into his husband as he answered, “I want us to keep her.”

“Then I guess we have some shopping to do at Pam’s”, Dean fired back smugly, “Let’s go buy some doggie shit with Daddy, huh Layla? Well not literal doggie shit, you know.”

Cas was flabbergasted. He couldn’t move or speak, he just stared at his husband. “Who the ever-loving fuck are you and what have you done with Dean?” Cas inquired, still stunned.

“What?”  Dean chortled back at Cas, “I can’t want her too?”

“No, actually,” Cas retorted, “You can’t, not the Dean Winchester I married. He doesn’t do pets.”

“Well apparently Layla here has convinced the Dean Winchester that you married to change his mind, if that’s alright with you,” Dean grinned.

It began to register that Dean, _his_ Dean, was serious.  Cas let it sink in and his eyes softened as he glanced up at his husband who was gazing back lovingly at him.  “Really? Honest?” Cas implored.

“Really, honest,” Dean sweetly answered, “She wasn’t any trouble and you just seemed so happy with her. Maybe it’s meant to be, Cas.”

Then Dean broke into his shitty Scottish brogue from his Russell Crowe Robin Hood fetish and announced, ”Fate has smiled upon us at last. And I, for one, shall not turn my back on her.”

“Jesus, you are such an ass,” Cas groaned. “Yah, but I’m your ass,” Dean answered with another kiss as they exited the car on Cas’ side.

“I’m Dad, you’re Daddy, no discussions, “ Dean stipulated as they walked hand in hand to Pam’s Pets, Layla prancing happily beside them on her leash. “Aaaaaand there he is,” Cas mocked affectionately at Dean.

Pam was thrilled for them. They shopped with her help for an hour for all the _essential items_ , according to Dean, who lost the argument on how the fuck a pink fluffy squeaky bunny was an essential item. And truthfully no matter how many times the two men exchanged glances; Pam couldn’t tell which of the two was happier.

They put the overstuffed bags into the back seat of the Impala. Neither man could contain his smile as they started home with Layla on Cas’ lap and their hands once again joined fingers laced on the seat between them. Dean dropped Layla and Cas off at home and headed off to work.  Not, however before reminding Cas about the thank you he still owed.  Cas was determined to pay Dean back, that night, with interest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, what do you think?


	5. Blindsided

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thus begins the angst...sorry...

The next couple of days seemed to float by with all that needed to be done before Christmas and with the happy addition of Layla.  Cas ran errands in town, Layla always with him, welcomed by the shop owners.  Cas couldn’t believe how fast it got around that the “handsome Winchesters” had a new family member, albeit a dog.

They finalized the menu for Christmas and the guest list as well.  Sam and Jess would be staying at the house in guest room that Dean and Cas had designed just for them.  Charlie and Dorothy, Ellen, Bobby, and Jo, and Pam would be joining them for dinner.  It all seemed to be coming together.

Dean got the call on Wednesday about three in the afternoon.  He was working with two homicide detectives from a neighboring city, larger than their small town, on a case that may have drifted into his jurisdiction.  Cas called once and if Dean didn’t answer, he would know it was because his husband was busy.  Cas knows the system, if Dean doesn’t pick up, he would expect a call back as soon as he was available.  If there was an emergency of some sort, Cas would call a second time and Dean would pick up immediately.

In the seven years they have been together, five of them as husbands, Dean has only had Cas place the second call twice.  The first time, he had been so sick he needed Dean to take him to the hospital; he had a very bad stomach bug and ended up staying for two days on IV fluids.  The second time was when Cas’ only family member, his sister Anna, went into labor and Cas needed to let Dean know that as planned he was catching a flight to Chicago to be there when the baby was born. Dean flew out the next day. 

 So when Dean heard his cell ring again and it was Cas, he couldn’t help but feel a little concern rise with bile in his throat. 

“Hey guys, this is my husband so I’m gonna need to take this in the other room. Get some more coffee and I’ll be back in a sec.”  Only Dean’s not really sure he will be as he dials Cas who answers on the first ring.

“Dean.”  That’s all Cas said, but with an edge to his voice.

“Hey Cas, everything okay? You called twice, kinda puttin’ the emergency system in effect.”

“Dean,” Cas repeated, only softer.

“Cas what is it? Is something wrong? Where are you? Are you home?” Dean felt a sense of urgency to get to Cas.

“Dean _,  D-D_ ean… the vet called.”

“Cas, spit it out man. You are startin’ to scare me here!”

“Garth called and he needs me to bring Layla down.   Needs to check her for a micro chip.  A family from the next town over called today looking for a lost yorkie.” And damn if Dean wasn’t afraid this would happen.

Shit, shit, shit Dean thought to himself, “I’m sorry man. Are you gonna take her down then? I’m in the middle of a meeting with two detectives from out of town.”

And as soon as those words slipped out of his mouth he realized that he should have sucked them back in and he would if he could.  This was Castiel Winchester we were talking about here. He would not have invoked the double call if he didn’t need it.  He heard desperation in Cas’ next words that he can’t remember ever having heard from his husband.

“Dean, _I-I_ …” Cas sounded broken and Dean realized that he was at a complete loss of words.

“Cas, talk to me. What is it?” Dean said softly.

“I don’t think I can take her without you.” And Dean got the whole picture. Cas was gonna have to give this dog back after Dean said they could keep her. But before Dean could formulate an answer, Cas broke his train of thought.

“Never mind Dean, sorry. I realize now that you’re busy and this isn’t really a double call worthy thing. I will take her down myself. I’ll be fine.  I- just… I mean… She is _just_ a dog. I’m sure they have found her _real_ owners and they will be happy to have her back.” Cas, Dean’s very eloquent Cas, breath hitching, stumbling over those simple words was all Dean needed to put him back on track.

“Cas, I will meet you at Garth’s office in twenty minutes, okay?” Dean waited for Cas to answer him.

“ _Th_ - _Th_ ank you Dean.” Cas managed to stutter out.

“Alright, man. See you in a few.” And Dean was about to hang up when he heard Cas speak his name softly.

“Dean?”

“Yah,?” Dean answered, concern for his husband building.

“I mean it, you know. Thank you.” And the timid tone in Cas’ voice killed Dean.

“I know you do, Cas.  Hon, are you okay to drive?” Dean really needed to know because he can’t ever remember Cas sounding so unsure of himself.

And all Cas could squeeze out of his tight throat is one very rough sound, “mhmm.”

“I love you Cas, be right there, ‘kay.” It’s a statement more than a question and given Cas’ difficulty in getting out his previous words, Dean didn’t expect an answer, but by now he couldn’t tell whose voice was rougher, his or Cas’.

Dean never told Cas, but he had grown quite fond of Layla himself. She was a darn cute little shit, well behaved and not a yippy rat like other small dogs Dean had run into in the past. Dean had just begun to think what Cas had known all along, she was perfect for them.   She wiggled her way into their lives and just as they had made room in their hearts and their home for her, there was the potential to have her ripped away from them.  And all of that was waiting for him at the vet.

Dean coughed away the lump in his throat and went back to the conference room to explain that he had a slight family emergency and needed to meet his husband.  The two detectives thought they had enough info to continue with their investigation and Dean gave them his card so they could call him later if they need more of his help.  Then he headed out to the impala and was on his way to meet Cas and Layla.

******

When Dean pulled into the parking lot of Fitzgerald’s Veterinary Office, he immediately spotted Cas in his car and could see that he was holding Layla in his lap. He approached the car and Cas opened the door when he saw Dean.  Cas’ worried blue eyes conveyed every thought he couldn’t get out over the phone and Dean just leaned in and kissed him.  The feeling of Cas’ trembling lips was almost too much for Dean, so he tried to lighten Cas’ load by kissing Layla on the top of her head as well. Cas smiled and his eyes became a little glassy, but he cleared his throat and looked at Layla.

“Let’s get this over with as quickly as possible.” Cas voice wavered a little even though he managed a stoic posture.

“You know Cas, they could be wrong here.” Dean took Cas’ free hand and squeezed it.

Cas looked doubtful but appreciative and squeezed back as Dean opened the door.  Garth was standing there at the counter holding the wand, waiting room full of people and pets. Cas clung a little tighter to Layla before looking at the doctor.  Dean waited but when Castiel didn’t greet the man, he stepped in.

“Hey Doc, so you think she might be their missing yorkie?” Dean cringed for sounding like Captain Obvious and silently apologized to Cas by slipping an arm around his waist.

“Yes, and I can’t tell you both how sorry I am if it is a match,” Garth replied with a tone that was sympathetic and sincere. “She sure is a sweet little thing, and I know how attached Cas has gotten to her.  Just the other day, Pam at the pet shop was tellin-“

Dean cleared his throat abruptly and cut Garth off before Cas’ eyes widened any further. As it was Dean though they would pop clean out of his head at any minute. Garth looked at Dean who motioned to Cas clutching the small dog.

“Right! Up on the counter with her, please. This won’t hurt; all we have to do is wave the wand and listen,” Garth instructed shifting back into Doctor mode as he readied for the simple procedure.

Cas stepped forward to put Layla on the counter and petted her silky coat as the doctor waved the wand and got an immediate beep.  Cas looked to Dean as an audible gasp escaped his lips. Dean tried to reach out to him but the waiting room was full of people and Cas looked at them and shook his head slightly so only Dean would know.

“Well, unfortunately the numbers match fellas,” Garth consoled Cas as he patted his shoulder, “She belongs to the Bakers and her name is Babette. I’ll give them a call and let them know.” At the sound of her real name the yorkie’s huge ears perked up she tilted her head curiously at Garth.

Cas sucked in a sharp breath, drew his lips into a firm line and dropped his eyes to the hands that carded through the small yorkie’s silvery coat. “Well-  how fortunate for the Bakers and …Babette here, right Dean?”

Dean nodded in agreement but could see the pain in those blue eyes he had come to know so well despite Cas spewing out diplomacy in what could only be described as an agonizing situation for him. Just two days earlier, in this very office the dog had become his and now this? How was this fair? Why had they not checked for a chip then?

Cas stroked her once more and then asked Dean to stand with her for a minute while he ran to the car. Dean was scratching her ears when his husband came back in carrying an overstuffed bag.

“I’d like you to give them these things when they come for her.  They were her things at our house.” Cas murmured as deposited the bulging bag on the counter pushing it towards Garth.

“You know she could stay with you until they come for her if you’d like,” Garth offered softly.  Dean felt the tension in the room intensify and Cas straightened up like he had been tied to a pole.

“No thank you, Doctor Fitzgerald,” Cas affirmed in such a formal tone it seemed to set Garth back a bit.  He continued, “Dean and I have to get back to work.  I am sure the Bakers will be here soon.  I really have to go now.” He nodded towards his husband blue eyes blinking quickly,  “See you after work Dean.  Thank you again for your help Doctor. Goodbye Babette… be a good girl.”

And with that Cas made an escape to his car. Dean felt like someone had punched him in the stomach when Cas made his last statement to that little yorkie. Dean followed Cas but not before making a statement of his own.

“And you tell those Bakers to take damn good care of her _this_ time,” Dean demanded, voice almost quavering “and who names a damn dog Babette anyway? Sounds like the start of a damn French porno.” Garth winced and nodded his head in the direction of the full waiting room. It sank in and Dean blushed deeply as he turned to the crowded waiting room and rhetorically asked, “Any of you want to have to call out Babette at the top of your lungs when your dog wanders off? …Just saying here!”

Dean cast a final glance at the dog and then ran out to Castiel’s car just in time to see him pull his hands away from his face and put the car in reverse.  The look on Cas’ face startled Dean who wondered if Cas should even be driving.  Dean hopped into the impala quickly and tried to catch up to Cas but there was traffic in between them.  He just hoped Cas was alright enough to make it home In one piece.

******

Cas had already hung up his trench coat and was straightening the living room when Dean got home.

“Why aren’t you back to work? I thought you had visiting investigators to get back to at the office.” Cas sniffed but tried to play off the whole leaving the scene of the incident like he wasn’t bothered.

Dean tried to disguise his concern, “Just checkin’ up, ya left kinda quickly. Everything copasetic?”

“I am fine, Dean. No chick flick moment needed here,” Cas uttered trying to hide the tenor of defeat in his voice, “It’s over, she is going to be with her real owners and we don’t have to worry about her anymore. Go back to work, I need to write. I’ll see you at dinner.”

“Okay, I’m goin’, but I’m really sorry, Jesus, such a shitty deal, ”Dean approached Cas to give him a hug or at least a quick kiss, but Cas flinched back and put up his hands.

“Hey, sorry just wanted a smooch,” Dean conveyed nervously, silently calling bullshit on Cas being okay with this whole crappy deal. Dean could read Cas’ body language just like one of his novels and he was trying to mask his real feelings here. Cas may have been writing fine, but Dean read sad.

“Please.  I’m on a new chapter and she was just a dog…  Maybe it wasn’t meant to be after all,” Cas stated quietly.  And with that and no “smooch” for Dean, Cas turned and ambled towards his office.

 “Cas…” Dean pleaded softly, arms aching to give just one hug to his hurting husband.

And then Cas snapped. He stopped in his tracks, whirled around and blue lasers locking into green. Dean swallowed thickly in the heat of that anger.

“Jesus Christ on toast! She’s not ours, she never was! She was just a fucking lost dog with some stupid French fucking name! Get over it already and leave me the fuck alone!”

And then he stomped from the living room to his office and slammed the door. Dean stood in his spot stunned for a few seconds; Cas never spoke to him like that. He dropped his overcoat on the couch and walked over to Cas’ office. The door wasn’t locked; they had no locks except the front and back doors. Cas wanted it that way. He never wanted either of them to be able to lock the other out if they argued.  Dean was glad of that idea today, though he didn’t consider this an argument. 

He didn’t hear any noise behind the door so he gingerly opened it expecting to see a pissed Cas at his computer ready to type and send him away.  What he saw instead was like a vice grip on his heart. There sat Cas in his desk chair turned to face the wall, back to the door silently weeping, shoulders shaking, not a sound.

Cas, six feet tall and stoic, who never cried.  This was the man who could now hold his own with all Dean’s coworkers in the police department busting his chops. The man who met with murderers and victims’ families to research his work and who made occasional presentations about profiling killers at local colleges. Brave Cas who had once even interviewed a serial killer on death row, though Dean didn’t like that at all.  That Cas, _his Cas_ , was now weeping uncontrollably over the loss of Layla whom they had for only five days. 

Dean knew one thing for certain as he slipped out of his gun holster, placing it on Cas’ desk, and approached Cas- This wasn’t about the fucking dog!  It couldn’t be. This was something unearthed that was much bigger than that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, if you don't hate me too much, let me know what you think...


	6. The Bigger They Are, the Harder They Fall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dean comforts Cas after their loss, and Cas struggles. He asks a favor which Dean misinterprets and which causes him to panic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pain...lots of Pain... (spoken in the voice of Wot from A Knights Tale)

Dean spoke Cas’ name softly and reached out to touch his shoulder, unsure of what reaction his contact would bring. He didn’t want to startle him but he needed to comfort his husband and now.  Thankfully Cas let Dean spin the chair away from the wall and as Cas faced Dean, he sucked in a deep breath he must have needed for a long time.  He cried out Dean’s name in such anguish that Dean didn’t think he could stay on his feet.

He knelt as close to Cas as he could, settling himself between Cas’ legs and enveloped him in his arms as tightly as possible.  Cas hung onto Dean, fisting his dress shirt and cried hard for a long time and the only thing Dean could make out was Cas crying his husband’s name over and over again.  Dean cried along with him, cradling his head, talking in his ear.

“Come on Cas, that’s it. Let it all go... It’s alright, I’m here. I am not goin’ anywhere... I love you, hon. I’m so sorry.”

Over and over he spoke to Cas and slowly but surely Cas calmed down and regained some composure.  His breath hitched in little broken sobs getting quieter until Cas would make the mistake of raising his eyes to Dean’s and then when blue met green the out of control sobs would start again.

Dean was taken aback by the reaction Cas was having here and now to the loss of this dog. Cas had cried at their wedding, but happy pretty tears in streams down his face, completely manageable.  Cas hadn’t even been this upset when once on an investigation, when they were still in California, an officer had been shot and injured and the department had mistakenly called Cas and told them it was Dean.  Neither Dean nor Cas would ever be thought of as girly with their feelings. In fact, it was one of the things that attracted them to each other. Neither was a drama queen, no pun intended.

Dean decided to get Cas to move up to their bedroom because he really thought Cas needed to lie down. 

“Come on babe, let’s get you upstairs to lay down for a while, alright?” Dean practically cooed at Cas he was so worried.

Cas attempted to shrug away from Dean’s coddling as he stated, “Not a baby here.”

“I know,” Dean assured him, ”but you are scarin’ the shit out of me and I just need to know what is going on here. You’re more upset than I have ever seen you... over this dog.  Are you okay? Talk to me, man.”

“I’m not upset, I am emotional. There’s a difference,” Cas hesitated as he whispered, “I just want to lay down with you for a while. “

Dean got Cas upstairs and the two of them into some pajama pants and t-shirts. He pulled back the covers and they both crawled into bed exhausted, Cas especially so.  Cas snuggled his head onto the taller man’s chest breath still hitching, and despite his earlier words about being fine, hung onto him for dear life.  Dean returned the favor, one arm underneath Cas and around his shoulders, the other strumming through his hair, stroking up and down his back or patting him softly. Whatever Dean thought he needed he did and eventually he got Cas to sleep.

Then and only then did Dean allow himself to really feel the enormity of his husbands strange outpouring of emotion. When he thought about it, he couldn’t help but cry again. He wasn’t even sure what the fuck for yet. Was Cas truly heartbroken over the little dog or was it something much larger in their relationship that Cas had yet to share with Dean?  Dean gave into sleep because he knew he wouldn’t have any answers until Cas woke anyway.  The last thing he did was text Chief Mills that he had a family emergency and would not be in for the rest of the day or tomorrow.  He had no idea what morning would bring but couldn’t image running off to work like none of this shit had happened, nor could he leave Cas home to deal with it on his own.

******

As Cas slept, Dean kept a watchful eye on his husband. He was pretty sure at one point Cas wasn’t really sleeping, just avoiding getting up.  As the sun went down and their normal dinner time passed, Dean realized that Cas was probably in bed for the night.  He got up and got Cas a glass of water in case he “woke up” thirsty.   He made himself a sandwich about nine but took it up to the bedrrom and ate it on the loveseat by the fireplace in case Cas stirred.  A couple of times when Cas rustled the covers, Dean tried to offer him the water and talk to him, but Cas just rolled over and pulled the blankets over his head.  Dean wanted to tell Cas that he was sorry they lost Layla too.  He wanted to take Cas’ pain and absorb it so Cas wouldn’t hurt anymore, but Dean knew that Cas had to let him in first, and he didn’t think that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.  So Dean rubbed Cas’ back when he stirred, whispered his apologies, meaning well but knowing they were fruitless, and encouraged Cas to tell him if he needed anything.  Cas never did, not once the entire night. Maybe in the morning Dean thought to himself.

The next morning about seven thirty Dean woke after a fitful night’s sleep and waited for Cas to wake as well.  By eight thirty, Dean had gotten the picture and dragged himself into the bathroom to shower. He padded back into the bedroom to dress with a towel around his waist, to find Cas awake curled up on the love seat with a throw blanket.  Dean came around the front of the love seat to face Cas, only to find that Cas had Layla’s favorite squeaky bunny in one hand. 

“Hey, babe,” Dean sighed, “You-“

“Not yet,” Cas interrupted eyes cast at the floor, “okay?” And Dean just buried his face in Cas’ soft bed head and kissed him before going across the room to throw on some jeans and a henley.  As Dean descended the stairs to make breakfast, he thought he heard the squeak of the bunny toy, and damn if he couldn’t help but see those big triangle ears and that sweet furry face cocked to the side, curiously searching for it. Dean wondered how a fucking pink bunny toy drew that kind of reaction from a grown man. And if it took Dean’s vision a few minutes to clear from the tears, no one had to know. 

Dean decided to make Cas’ favorite oatmeal for breakfast, with all the maple syrup, brown sugar, nuts and dried fruits that Cas loved.  He hoped the smell would draw him downstairs and that he would be happy to have his favorite breakfast, but in reality Dean also wanted something that would keep on low on the stove if Cas decided to take a while to come down.  Dean decided to wait for Cas to eat, but made coffee and poured a mug for himself and drank it while he read the morning paper.

Cas came down about ten, in jeans, a t shirt and one of Dean’s flannel shirts.  Dean knew that Cas had plenty of his own flannels on his side of the closet, and it pulled at his insides knowing that Cas had needed one of his.  Cas sat across from Dean at the table, no eye contact yet, Dean assuming that it would reopen the emotions, so he didn’t force the issue.  Dean silently got up, poured a mug of coffee with Cas’ favorite peppermint creamer, got two bowls of oatmeal and set them on the table.  As he set the oatmeal in front of Cas, he gave Cas’ shoulder a small squeeze.  He was rewarded with the placement of Cas’ hand over his own.

That simple gesture let Dean know that Cas was still there, not angry, just hurt. He sat back down across from his husband who raised his head and offered a weak smile, which never quite made it to his eyes, which were red and swollen, with deep circles beneath despite all the “sleep” of the night before.  It pained Dean to see him like this, but he offered a smile back, a silent I love you, I am here.  The two ate in quiet, rather Dean ate and Cas pushed his oatmeal around the bowl and drank his coffee.  Finally after what seemed like a fucking eternity to Dean, thank you very much, Cas opened up.

“I’m sorry, Dean. I don’t know what… I just don’t…” Cas whispered as he searched for the words.  Dean got up and knelt by his husband’s chair, ran his hand up the back of his neck into his hair and stroked reassuringly.

“You don’t have to go there,” Dean said trying to offer Cas an out if he wasn’t ready, “not yet, if you can’t.  I understand, I think.”

Cas lowered his head to Dean’s shoulder and Dean scratched his scalp soothingly.  “I feel like such a pathetic ass, crying over a dog,” Cas confessed to Dean, “I’m sorry.”

Don’t…,” Dean soothed, ”don’t apologize for your feelings, Cas. Jesus, if you can’t let it rip with me, then where, man.”

“Christ, there’s this massive hole,” Cas croaked out, palm splayed on his chest, “it just blindsided me…out of nowhere. I just never… it wasn’t part of my plan, our plan and then there she was.” Cas confessed.

“I know, man, I know,“ Dean agreed, “kinda hard not to fall for her,  huh?”

“We made choices about what we wanted and I just never thought…,” Cas looked at Dean eyes wide a bit panicky, breath shortening, “I didn’t… didn’t  know what I was missing. She was so-“Cas dropped his head again.

“Look at me, hon,” Dean implored as he lifted Cas’ chin so their gazes met, “Did I take that from you? Did you want more and not tell me? Did I miss something?” Dean pleaded for a response.

“No, Dean. Nothing like that, at all.  I’m serious,” Cas answered his husband with steady words and eye contact. “We made a plan, together, us.  Five years ago, Dean,” Cas pronounced and held up his ring, “I think maybe I made a mistake and now… now I paid for that.” And with that admission, two things transpired.  Cas began to cry again on Dean’s shoulder and Dean’s heart broke for his husband. 

Dean held Cas, rubbing his back, kissing his head, his temples, whatever he could reach.  He explained to Cas that he wasn’t paying for anything.  That he had become attached to Layla himself.  He reassured him that it was okay to admit that he thought he made a mistake when they decided they didn’t want anything that would tie them down, they had both wanted that then. 

“But, this is now, hon and if you want something different, you gotta tell me, so we can figure it out…together, “Dean told him pulling  his face up, pressing their foreheads together, “I’m sorry… I thought when we left the vet on Monday it was a done deal. I’d never do that to you...not my Cas.”

“We can still fix this babe,” Dean declared, “we don’t have to go back to the old deal, we can still change our mind, right?”

Cas looked at Dean and his eyes, red and tear filled, “I thought so with Layla, but now..no. I think if it was meant to be she would still be here...  with us. It’s done… I’m done.” And with that Cas got up, did the dishes and went to his office to work.

Dean stayed home, he couldn’t leave Cas today when he seemed so sad.  Dean felt responsible for the whole shitty mess. Dean did a little present wrapping, tried to stay busy, not hover over Cas. He came to the kitchen again when Dean called him to see if he wanted to head into town for lunch.

He agreed to go and didn’t eat much, but he tried to answer Dean’s feeble attempt at small talk, his blue eyes lacking any of their normal sparkle.  He smiled at people who greeted them and barely flinched each time someone said how sorry they were about Cas not being able to keep Layla.  Great fucking idea Winchester, Dean thought forgetting they live in gossip girl central.  By the time lunch was over, Ellen was physically running interference for the couple, glancing apologetically at Dean. 

“He, okay?” Ellen mouthed at one point behind Cas.  Dean just shook his head and asked for the bill.  They walked back to the Impala, and of course had to walk by the pet store at which point Cas decided to take up Olympic speed walking.  But Pam was lying in wait by the door to offer her condolences.  Dean knew she meant well, but he also knew that Cas had had enough.  She slipped a card into Dean’s hand as they turned to leave but Dean just shoved it in his pocket and walked with Cas. When they finally got to the car Dean tried to smooth things over.

“Jesus… that was a complete cluster fuck. I’m sorry, man.” Dean said regretfully, “I thought it would take our mind off things for a bit and I feel shittier than before.” It was clearly worse for Cas who didn’t even answer, so Dean didn’t push.  He just got Cas the hell out of there and back home.  Cas made tea and went right to his office.

Later that evening Cas emerged from his office and made dinner, grilled skirt steak and salad.  Dean tried to assess how Cas was doing after the horrid lunch date.  “You okay? I still fill like a dick about today,” Dean said hoping for a response.   

“Nope, not okay… and I don’t really know how to say this so I am just gonna say it, “ Cas stated plainly. “ I hurt, everywhere... but mostly here,” Cas said putting his hand over his heart. “I don’t blame you, not for any of it…but I don’t know how to fix it, not yet.  I’m asking for space to figure it out. Please,” Cas pleaded, eyes pained.

Dean completely panicked.  Full out lost his shit, sobbing panicked, ”What are you saying?  What’s that mean, honey, please…please Cas what, holy shit….I c-can’t b-breathe.”

Cas stood up and Dean practically knocked him over begging for forgiveness, pleading with Cas to stay, not go anywhere or do anything stupid. Cas hugged Dean and shushed him, speaking calmly, “We’re fine. I didn’t mean to give you that impression, fuck…I’m not going anywhere and neither are you. I love you, that will never change.  I just think I misjudged what I wanted for us…together.”

“I’m asking you to move on, leave it alone.  You’re walking on god damn egg shells around me. Stop, “ Cas explained, “ _I_ have to find _my_ way through this, for _me_...”

“I don’t really know where I stand in all this,” Cas furthered, “but I know I don’t want to do this through Christmas, in front of everyone, so I am asking you to leave _it_ , not me, alone.”

“Okay,” Dean responded, “ I- I just…”

“Dean, leave it,“ Cas demanded, and reluctantly, Dean did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I'd like to say to gets better soon , but I hate to lie...
> 
> Comments feed the psyche people...


	7. Salt in the Wounds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A chance meeting is very upsetting for the Winchesters...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heartbreak and comfort smut...

Cas woke the next morning and eased out of bed, heading to the bathroom.  He looked in the mirror and sighed.  It was Friday, and really hard for him to believe that just Wednesday he had been puttering around the house with Layla.   But she was gone now and that explained the current haggard look on his face.  He knew he needed to get himself together, it was only six days until Christmas, two until Sam and Jess arrived on Sunday.  He really didn’t want to be in a state that caused people to ask if something was wrong.  He just wanted to get through Christmas, and wow that sounded awful.  He and Dean had always made Christmas so special, getting through it sounded like it would be a chore.  Cas hoped this year he would not turn it into just that for all of them.

After grabbing a quick shower, he proceeded downstairs to the kitchen to make breakfast for Dean.  Dean would return to work today and Cas was determined to put at least this part of his routine back into place. He wanted Dean to be able to eat and go to work without worrying about Cas.  It was never a good feeling to have a distracted Dean at work; in his line, he needed his wits about him.  So Cas set his mind to frying bacon and making Dean an omelet. 

Cas heard his husband’s footsteps above and then the shower begin to run.  He waited for the water to shut off before he put bread in the toaster and plated the food.  He poured a cup of coffee for each of them and sat down at the table.  He watched Dean as he approached and saw his face move from apprehension to something a little brighter as he viewed the scene in the kitchen.  He leaned over and kissed Cas good morning in a crisp green shirt and Rudolph tie.  Cas recognized a ploy to cheer him up when he saw one, and he kissed Dean back gratefully.

“I thought you hated that tie,” Cas teased, “you hardly ever wear it.”

“Well, a really hot guy gave it to me so…” Dean teased back gauging Cas’ reaction to the comment.

“Oh really,” Cas shot back quirking an eyebrow, “tell me more about this hot guy who gives you presents.”

Dean sat down across from Cas and continued, “He’s smart, and generous, and really sweet, and hot!”

“You mentioned the hotness already,” chided Cas.

“He’s the kind of guy that would wake up early to make you a nice breakfast, even when he is having a shitty time,” Dean said softly glancing up at Cas as he took a bite of his omelet.

Cas smiled at Dean softly. He wasn't blushing, not at all. They ate the rest of their breakfast holding their free hands in the center of the table in their comfortable kitchen.  It was then that Cas thought he saw a light at the end of his tunnel. 

Dean was loading plates and mugs into the dishwasher while Cas washed the frying pans, as they discussed Sam and Jess arriving on Sunday.  They would go get them at the airport together, they decided.  Cas reminded Dean that more pressing than that was the fact that although they had decorated most of the house inside and out for Christmas, they needed to get a tree.

“We should probably have gotten one last weekend,“ Cas said staring out of the kitchen window, “guess we got distracted.”

“It will be better if we get it tomorrow, the needles won’t be falling all over the place on Christmas morning,” Dean offered reminding Cas of crappy tree that shed early last year. 

“That’s true,” Cas agreed, “Just hope there’s a good one left in town.”

Cas heard the dishwasher close and felt Dean’s arms snake around his waist from behind pulling him into Dean’s chest.  Cas, turned, wrapped his arms around Dean and kissed him softly on the lips.  He lingered long enough for Dean to return the kiss and open his mouth against Cas’, gently meeting their tongues.  When the kiss ended, Cas buried his head in the crook of Dean’s neck and nuzzled, he embraced Dean more firmly and sighed.

They parted for Dean to leave for work, wishing each other a good day and meaning it.

“Stay safe,” Cas stated clutching Dean’s hand as he walked him to the mud room door that led to the garage.

“You know it,” Dean answered, “Call me if anything comes up.” Dean leaned in for one more sweet peck on the lips and softly said, “I mean it babe…anything… call me.”

Cas managed a nod, turned back towards his office and smiled to himself as he heard the roar of the Impala.

******

The remainder of Friday went quickly and once again it was Saturday snow removal time at the Winchesters.  They had breakfast and were donning boots and coats when Dean had slipped his hand into the pocket of his jacket.  He found the card that Pam had slipped him on Thursday, the lunch date from hell. Dean was prepared to give it a glance and toss it when he his eyes registered a tiny photo of a yorkie in the corner of the card.  He shoved it quickly in his wallet, not wanting to upset Cas and pulled on his gloves to go out.  They completed the snow removal working in tandem, and neither man mentioned the missing third party that had been present last week. 

They headed into town to pick out a tree from the corner lot.  They looked forward to this outing every year.  They usually made a morning or afternoon of it by getting hot chocolate and chatting with people in town.  They Tran family ran the local florist shop and the seasonal tree lot.  Dean and Cas were glad to see Kevin who was home from Yale for the holidays.  He was a funny kid reminding them of Sam a few years ago.  They picked their tree and walked it back to tie it to the Impala. 

They were headed to the coffee shop for hot chocolate, elbows linked, peeking in the shop windows when Dean heard Mrs. Tran.   “There they are,” she called out pointing, “Dean, Cas, hi.”  She was waving and hurrying toward them with what looked like three or four other people and holy shit a fucking yorkie on a leash.  Fuck. No way, Dean thought and then he glanced at Cas. Cas stood stock still and in that instant they both knew who was coming at them; The Bakers and Babette.

Dean didn’t know what to do, fuck him. Cas was finally adjusting and now this. Christ this wasn’t fair, and then Mrs. Tran and the Bakers were right there in front of them.

“Mr. and Mrs. Baker,” Mrs. Tran said proudly, “These are the Winchesters, Dean and Cas.”

Mrs. Baker spoke up offering out her hand to Dean and then Cas, “Well how nice to finally meet you.  We took a chance just asking about you but we really wanted to thank you.” Dean shook her hand and when he saw Cas reach out, he slid his arm around his waist, knowing Cas must be dying.

“Yes, we really can’t thank you enough for finding Babette, can we kids?” Mr. Baker added, “Sorry, this is Jennifer and Michael.  We were really beside ourselves looking for her.”

Dean wanted to punch Mr. Baker in his Babette calling mouth, but instead smiled at the kids and shot a look to Cas. With a forced smile only Dean would recognize, answered them both graciously, “We were happy to help her. She was in such a state when we found her.  I am glad to see her looking so well.” Though Dean knew damn well that Cas had not looked at that dog, not even once. Dean did, though, and wow she looked as cute as ever.

They all stood there uncomfortably for a few minutes.  Dean broke the painful silence, tearing his eyes from Layla, because fuck if he was calling her Babette.  “Well, it was very nice to meet you all, but we just bought our tree and we are heading home to put it up.” Dean choked out. 

“We thought maybe we could all get hot chocolate before you go, and you could see Babette again,” Mrs. Baker offered genuinely.

“Oh that’s very sweet, but we have company coming.” Dean retorted, “and we need to get home and get her decorated, holiday and all.”

With that, Dean tightened his arm on Cas’ waist and scooped him back in the direction of the Impala.  “Jesus fucking Christ, Cas.” Dean cried out and couldn’t even look at his husband till he got him to the car.  He opened the passenger door and Cas ducked into his seat.  Dean practically ran around the car and got in on his side.  He looked over at Cas and didn’t even have words.  Cas lifted his gaze to Dean’s and simply said, “Let’s go home.”

About two minutes into the drive Dean heard a seatbelt unclip and felt Cas slide over and heard the middle belt fasten.  Then he felt Cas’ head on his shoulder and his body pressed against his side.  Dean put his hand on Cas’ thigh and squeezed, grateful his husband had sought him for comfort. That was better than he expected.  And at that very moment, Dean began to plan a secret mission.  It was a risk, and he hoped that it would help his wonderful husband and not make it worse. He just knew that the man he loved was sitting next to him and reaching out, and it was a chance he was willing to take.

******

When Dean pulled the car into the garage, Cas helped him get the tree off the roof and into the mud room where they kicked off their boots.  “Can we leave it for a while,” Cas asked softly taking Dean’s hand. “Sure, babe,” Dean said soothingly as Cas led Dean upstairs. 

When they got to the bedroom, Cas buried himself in Dean’s chest and neck, kissing up behind Dean’s ear.  He whispered a breathy, “Please,” and Dean knew exactly what his husband was asking.  He turned them around, took a few steps and laid Cas gently down on the bed, covering his mouth with a deep kiss. Cas opened in response and then it seemed to Dean that a switch went on inside him.  Cas got greedy fast, one hand grabbing at Dean’s hair, the other at his hips pulling him in, moaning and urging his hips up to grind with Dean’s.

 Dean ground back down into Cas, hands making quick work of Cas’ shirt and then his own. Hot skin together with the friction brought out all the favorite sounds of urgency in the couple.  Pants were the next to be discarded as Dean urged Cas farther up on the bed toward the pillows.  As he settled back on top of Cas, kissing, touching, grinding them together, he couldn’t help but ask Cas quietly, “Okay, hon?” Cas answered, “I will be,” as he pressed their lengths together and groaned, “ Dean, Jesus, please…”

Dean answered by peppering wet kisses down Cas’ neck, across his muscular chest and lavishing attention to each of his nipples. Leaving them bitten and kiss swollen, he followed a familiar trail down Cas’ stomach. He was heading straight to do  what he thought Cas wanted when his husband stopped him, “No, need you now.”  Dean reached for the drawer of his bedside table to get the lube they needed and got Cas ready as quickly as he could, causing Cas’ writhing and moaning below him.  Dean lined himself up while Cas wrapped his legs around Dean’s waist.  They both groaned as Dean slid into Cas, inch by inch until he was fully encompassed by the heat of his body. Dean stilled for a moment waiting for Cas to adjust, and as Cas nodded Dean leaned in for a kiss and rolled his hips.

Dean watched every muscle in Cas face and responded to every twitch and every sound with a snap of his hips or a nip of his neck. He slipped his arms underneath Cas to hold him as he did his best to fuck the hurt out of Cas. That’s what Cas asked him to do with one breathy word and that’s what Cas needed, so Dean would give that to him. Cas’ heels pulled Dean in with every thrust and his hands pulled at his hair, grabbed at his ass and scratched at his back, searching for a way to ground himself with Dean.

“Jesus dean, fuck me…I need to feel you…I need you, I need you…” Cas panted into Deans neck as they rocked together.

“I’ve got you Cas…I’m here…I love you…” Dean tried desperately to comfort Cas as he pounded him into the mattress. Cas shouted as he came without Dean ever touching his hardness.  Dean followed right behind and they held each other tightly as they settled down and caught their breath.  “Thank you, Dean…” Cas whispered against Dean’s lips as they lay together. “…for today and now…for everything with Layla.”

“Cas, you are the kindest man I have ever met and you did not deserve what happened. When I said we should keep Layla, I thought she would be yours…ours forever. I never thought they would come back and I certainly never thought we would run into them In town and I’m sorry…so, so sorry, “ Dean looked directly into his husbands eyes.

“I know Dean, I don’t blame you at all. I hope you know that. I love you,” Cas said as he cupped Dean’s face and kissed him gently. “Let’s take a bath…and then put up our tree, okay?”

“Okay Cas, sounds good. I’ll start the bath, you rest here till it’s ready,” Dean agreed softly.

Dean called Cas to join him in the tub. He had closed the blinds and lit several candles on various shelves. The two men settled into the hot water and Dean gently washed Cas, scrubbing his hair and rinsing it. He turned and snuggled into Dean and they relaxed together quietly trying to rid themselves of what had been so upsetting.

*****

The tree looked beautiful when they finished decorating it. The ornaments they had collected over the years told their story. They remembered each one fondly as they put them on the tree. Now they gazed around the house, fully decorated and ready for Sam and Jess to join them and for the dinner they would host. Dean wrapped his arms around Cas and smiled to himself. He had secret plans and he couldn’t wait for Sam to get there to help him put them into play.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think. Please...


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